Robot & Alien October Valentine

Will you do my Valentine?

Um… first, it’s “be”, not “do”, the phrase is “be my Valentine”. And second, it’s October. The next holiday coming up is Halloween, not Valentine’s Day.

Well, will you? I one or two you!

You… what?

I number-less-than-three you! It’s how humans express love for each-other.

That’s… it’s great that you’re taking an interest in Earth culture, but I think you have missed some of the, um, nuances.

Are you trying to change the subject? Because I’m not done talking about how I <3 <3 <3 you.

No, just, you know how Earth computers have keyboards on them? And… well, there's this thing called "typography", and there's this other thing called a "heart" which is actually a pretty gross body part but which some humans believe to be the seat of emotions, and, well, to be honest it's sort of hard to explain.

You don't have to explain. You are so great, I wanna Valentine you all the way past zero and into negative integers! -1, -2, -3…

That's… gosh. That's sweet. Um, I <3 you too.